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There Is Magic in Surrendering Your Self – with Kute Blackson

Guest Interview

Hello beautiful souls! Kute Blackson joins me on the podcast today to discuss what it means to surrender. Kute (motivational coach and author of The Magic of Surrender) encourages us to look deep within and recognize our sense of ego and identification. Then, Kute reveals how life could be when we give up this identify and look at the world through curiosity instead of preconceived notions. 

To learn more about Kute Blackson and his work:
KuteBlackson.com
His book The Magic of Surrender is available at all major book retailers

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TRANSCRIPT


Julie Jancius 01:35

Hello, beautiful souls. Welcome back to the Angels and Awakening podcast. I’m your host and author, Julie Jancius. And today we have a very, very special guest on you’re gonna have really fun listening to him talk about his new book, The Magic of Surrender and surrender in acceptance are so powerful. And being on your life plan in this lifetime. We have Kute Blackson on the show today. Thank you so much for being here. 

Kute Blackson 02:06

Thanks for having me.

Julie Jancius 02:08

Of course. Okay, so I want to dive in and talk about your book, because I’ve heard you talk before a little bit about going beyond yourself. When you’re coming from life, from your egoic mind or from yourself or with the intention of creating for yourself, you’re really limited in what you can create here. But you have to go beyond talk to us a little bit about that. 

Kute Blackson 02:40

I think we have to go beyond the many times we are sort of identified with who we believe ourselves to be, we are identified with our ego, which is that perceived sense of what we have been conditioned to believe that we are this name, this body, this form this this personality, this person, this package, and we really believe ourselves to be this thing, right. And based on that the degree to which we identify with ourselves as me, I think is the degree to which we are in ego. And ego is what we identify ourselves to be. And so the degree to which we identify with me as this ego, self. Ego, when we’re locked in ego, we’re not able to see the whole. When we’re locked in ego, we only see a small sliver of the pie, we only see a small sliver of reality, we’re not able to see the infinite sort of unfolding the infinite possibilities in a situation, everything that is seeking to happen, we just see like a very small piece of reality based on our limited perception. And we think that the reality that we see and what we see is reality, but it’s not the whole, it’s just very limited. 

So if we live inside of ego and create inside of ego and set goals inside from the place of the ego, then likely what we will end up creating will also be very, very limited because we are in our own limitation. And so for me, that’s why I’m very passionate about the theme of surrender and the book because I think what we get to surrender is our– ultimately is our limited sense of self, our limited sense of identity, that we can surrender to our true nature as infinite beings our true nature as consciousness as energy as an infinite, you know, beingness that we all are ultimately beyond just this mind, body form, ego structure. And so to me, surrender is the key. I really believe that surrender was the key to the next level of our lives. Surrender is the real password to freedom. Surrender is the real key to manifestation. Surrender is the real secret and key to living an unlimited life because when we go beyond ego when we go beyond our limited sense of self and we open to more. Then we take the limitations of life. And when we take the limitations of of life we become available, we become open, we become receptive to the highest possibility of what is seeking to happen often, which we can’t really see from the perspective of our limited lens of ego structure. And so to me, surrender is the key. 

And I think in our culture today, we have so many misconceptions of of surrender this idea that surrender is weak, that surrender was giving up that surrender was, you know, waving the white flag that surrender is if you surrender, you’re going to be taken advantage of, you’re going to be a doormat, you’re going to be left behind, it means sitting there doing nothing, not only will you not manifest your goals, dreams and desires, but you’re going to get less in life. And I’m actually saying, What if you didn’t get less in life, but in truly surrendering, you opened beyond your limitation, you open beyond your limited sense of controlling everything, and maybe you won’t manifest what you thought you wanted. But What if you got more, more than you could have even imagined, from your own ego perspective. And so, for me, this is the magic, this is the possibility. And I think we all want more magic in our lives. When we don’t want to surrender we want to hold on to who we were we want to hold on to what was we want to hold on to old ways of being we want to hold on to old addictions we want to and holding on just keeps us stuck holding on to what is no longer aligned. Because we think it’s right from a limited perspective, because we think this is what should be happening from a limited perspective, because this is the person we think we need to be with my limited egos perspective, holding on to what is not not truly aligned. And holding on to what is not really a vibrational match simply keeps us stuck. And holding on blocks our blessings, holding on to what is not truly aligned is our, shall we say affirmation of our lack of trust in the universe. 

And so I think surrender, surrender is letting go of control. Or I should say, the illusion of control. You know, surrender is when we stop trying to force life to fit our limited idea of what we think it should be, and how we think it should be so that we can be available and open and allow life to show us life to lead us. So it’s a curiosity, it’s availability, it’s a willingness to embrace the unknown so that life can reveal the highest possibility of what is seeking to happen in a given moment. And so it requires to really, as you, as you mentioned, kind of unlimited ourselves, it requires going beyond the ego based model of creating life, which is all about, like, what do I want I as in a separate sense of self ego? What do I want? Yes, you might get what you thought you wanted, only to realize that what you thought you wanted was not what you really wanted, it was just what you thought you wanted based on who you thought you were. And so the question is like, who are you? Really right, who am I? Am I just this little limited sense of self, ego self? No, we are so much more. But because of our conditioning, which we can get into we kind of like are in a fight of control and safety and security. 

And so the real question, I would invite people to ask in terms of unlimited oneself, the real question is not what do I want? Because there’s going to be things that we’ve thought we wanted, and then we get it not really, or we look back, I would even challenge people. If you look back and look back at some of the things that you were so sure you wanted. And then you think back now 10 years later, no, wow, I can’t even believe I wanted that relationship. I can’t even believe I wanted that thing. It’s so not in your reality at this moment. So for me, the question becomes what is it that life is seeking to express? What is the deepest impulse of what the universe is seeking to express through me right now, what is the deepest impulse of what my soul is seeking to express? What is the deepest, most authentic intuition, impulse expression, the deepest truth that might be a seeking to express the Divine is seeking to express the universe is seeking to express through me and to allow ourselves to be fully open and available to that, I think when we can open ourselves to that deeper impulse, then the motivation and the vision and the intentions are arising from a deeper place than our limited ego and a limited perspective. It’s arising from a deeper dimension of beingness. And so now the intention is no longer limited. And the manifestation is no longer limited, because we’re in the flow with what’s truly aligned. So then we can sort of catch that vision, align ourselves, align our mind, our body, our perception, our money, our finances, our strategy, our business, our planning our logic around what is authentic and give 100% You know, so surrender doesn’t mean you sit down and do nothing. You might now work harder than than you’ve ever worked. But what is truly aligned, but you’re moving in flow, you’re moving in sync with your soul, and then it’s really about not getting attached to the outcome not getting attached to this is what It has to be because sometimes the journey that we go on in order to pursue a goal or dream or desire is really that evolutionary process that we need to sort of go through in order to learn the lesson so that we can develop it become the person who is capable of fulfilling the vision. So I tell people don’t get caught up in thinking my goal is to go sometimes it’s not the goal. It’s just the evolutionary process that life has to take you on. So I think when we can live with that openness, then we’re not putting limitations on life with we’re available. I think that’s the key,

Julie Jancius 10:30

I want to go back to something that you said, and I want to kind of go deeper into it, because I find that a lot of human souls will say to themselves, that they want to go beyond themselves that they’re ready for that next step, that they’re ready for God universe source to kind of come in and direct them and to take those blind steps with faith. And yet, there’s still so much fear within them at the exact same time, that they’re not taking that next step forward, that they’re really not moving on it. And there’s kind of a duality in that, where they’re saying, Yes, I want this, I want this to come through in my life. But that fear is like screaming, no, I’m not sure if I’m ready for this. I’m not sure if I’m worthy. I don’t know if I can do this. How do you help people? Or what do you say to people who need to break through that barrier, and just leap forward?

Kute Blackson 11:28

I think one level of it is just understanding what the block is. And the resistance is because understanding the nature of something can transform your relationship to something. And so I would just first say that if you’re facing resistance, or fear, or you know, the next level is calling you and it’s scary and you’re holding back or sabotaging in some way. It’s okay. Like, we don’t have to resist that. We don’t have to judge that. Sometimes surrendering is acknowledging that you’re not surrendered right now and letting that be okay. And embracing that fully, like, Okay, I’m afraid, okay, I’m not surrendering, okay, I’m resisting, and just fully being with that resistance and seeing what’s underneath that fully embracing that resistance. Because usually, underlying any behavior resistance, sabotaging, holding back is a positive intention. There’s some part of us that is trying to protect us in some way, from getting hurt from being disappointed from looking terrible from, you know, people’s opinions. And so, if we can learn to meet that fear in that resistance with compassion and loving, we start to transform our relationship with it. And so what it is, look, if you are not afraid, in some way of your next level, probably the life that you’re living is too small. If you’re like, Yeah, well, you know, easy peasy, probably, there’s no growth, and it’s not really your next level. Because if I said, Walk from your bedroom to the bathroom, there’s no fear, you know, usually, unless you’ve got other issues, there’s no fear, right? Because there’s no growth there. 

But when you’re talking about, write that book, put yourself out there, embrace that next level, it can be a little scary. And so to me, this is a sign that you’re on the edge of expansion, moving outside of your comfort zone into the unknown. That’s where the growth is. So if you’re not a bit scared, your goals are too small, expand your goals, you should be a little bit like, Oh, can I do this? Is it possible? I don’t know if I’m worthy, yes. Because the goals are evolutionary, they will require you to evolve and grow. A real goal will require you to evolve and become more to tap into a deeper dimension of yourself that currently you are not accessing and living. Because if all you could do is achieve the goal being exactly who you are, there’s no growth it is that you’re just doing the same thing over and over again. But if it requires that you access a part of yourself that you’re currently not in touch with, you’re currently not accessing you don’t even know if it’s in you, but it’s somewhere there. That’s a worthy goal. Because regardless of whether you achieve it or not, the pursuit of it will force you to grow. 

So embrace the fear. Welcome the fear, love yourself through it. And so what is it that is afraid? What is it that holds back? What is it that resists what is it that doesn’t surrender? It’s all the same thing. Ego is the perceived sense of what we believe ourselves to be this way. I’m a nice person. I’m not good at math. I’m not too creative. I’m not intuitive. I’m not a leader. I’m not this but now your goals like oh, I write that book, which now requires you to be a leader. It’s like, it starts contradicting your sense of identity. And so ego starts to freak out like, well, what what, because here’s the thing, the next level of your life requires an Next Level of view, the next level of view requires that you let go of what’s no longer line, the next level of view requires that you let go of the old version of you, you can’t manifest that next version of you being the old version of yourself. So surrender the next level requires a death, it requires a death of who you thought you were, which is why for the ego, what you believe yourself to be, which is not really you, but it’s what you believe yourself to be is terrifying because now you say next level, you say surrender, it’s like, I’m gonna die. 

And so resistance is natural, because the egos job. Ego is a creation, in response to certain things that happened to us when we were young. And the egos job is to two things, reinforce its existence, number to protect you from getting hurt, to make sure you don’t get hurt again. And so one of the ways ego protects us is we try to control everything. So if I can control how you see me, if I can control the navigate the world, if I can control certain factors, then I won’t get hurt again. So at least if I don’t step out and take the risk, I won’t get hurt, I can control there. And then I can control how you see me because if I don’t step out for forever, my safe to work mess up fail, then you won’t see me badly. So I’ll just stay back so that I can control how I feel control how you perceive me. It’s about control. We think if we can control everything, we won’t get hurt again. But this way of being is very limited. 

So if you understand the nature of the ego, the ego is not a thing. We think that the ego is a thing. And we think that the ego is what I am. But the ego is not a thing. The ego is a process. The ego is a process of identification. The sense of me identifying as this person, this persona, and its condition, the degree to which we are conditioned in our ego is the degree to which we’re not free. We’re just playing out the past conditioning of our childhood in creating that into a future in different experiences and we don’t have free will we don’t have free choice if we’re so living inside of ego conditioning. That is true limitation. 

And so you see as children, we didn’t have fear. You know, we jumped on the table naked we didn’t care like what did they think about me on Instagram? We didn’t give a rat’s you know what we just were being fully what we were jumped on a table naked. We don’t have any cellulite. We didn’t keep it but we were just letting it all hang out, peed on the couch. Didn’t feel any shame until our parents told us you know, that’s not cool. Girls don’t act that way. Boys Don’t Cry, you know, that’s not okay to do, you know, then we would sing. If we didn’t care if we didn’t sound like Celine Dion, we were just being whatever the hell it was, we were being fully expressed, just singing our lungs until we were told you can’t sing but your sister can sing. You’re the intelligent one. She’s the creative work. And now the conditioning process starts. And so two things happen. We were these free beings whole perfect and complete fearless, just fit a child will run straight into the street, a child would just just die. We don’t have that sense of ego, self consciousness over identification. That’s what we’re just surrendered in our natural state.

Kute Blackson 18:22

That we incarnate as souls into the human experience in order to learn to grow to evolve. We incarnate into the human experience, we meet our parents, God bless them. Most of our parents are kind of interesting characters. You know, they’re just doing the best that they know how to do based on their childhood and their parents and their upbringing. And, you know, some of us they screwed us up in certain ways. But it wasn’t like intentional, they were just conditioned themselves. And so we were born into this preset pattern of conditioning. Maybe Dad was crazy. If the mom was an alcoholic, maybe they were fighting all the time. Maybe there’s trauma, dysfunction, abuse, you know, some level of stuff going on in the family system. Maybe they weren’t really good people, but they just did not have the skills to know how to meet our emotional needs in some way. And so that may be for us as children was very painful. Because I’m so sensitive. I’m so vulnerable. I’m so open and no one is here to meet my needs. No one is here to take care of me. I don’t feel safe in the world. I feel kind of helpless. I feel disappointed. I feel hurt. 

So, two things happen. When ego starts getting creative. We learn all sorts of strategies to shut down, disconnect not feel shut down, disconnect not feel we erect walls around our heart and feeling sensitivity, so that we don’t have to feel the pain. This becomes a mechanism of controlling our feelings suppressed layers of unprocessed feeling begins to sort of get covered up covers up our true light in authentic expression and now our true essence our true nature gets hidden underneath If the layers of our authentic expression, and we control ourselves into a shape, we become who we think we need to be, in order to get love validation and approval, we become the nice girl, the sweet one, the kind one, the funny one, the caretaker, the one who is responsible for everyone. And we betray parts of ourselves to get love, validation and approval by developing a role, a mask a persona of what we think we need to be. And we think that the version of ourselves that we become, is who we are, but it’s not who we really are. And we don’t question. And so when you talk about that next level, or surrender, it requires that you let go of who you were, it feels like a death. 

And so the ego, why it’s often so scary to step into the unknown, and do the new and take that risk is because the ego doesn’t want to change. It wants to preserve its sense of self, and it wants to keep you safe, and it wants to make sure you don’t get hurt again. And so going into the unknown witness, I could go, I’ve never done this before. And I might get hurt, and I might be rejected, I don’t want to feel that. So this self preservation survival mechanism kicks in to protect us not out of negative intent, but out of positive intention. But the methodology that is wired into us unconsciously is limited. The ego doesn’t want to change, but it wants everyone and everything around us to change, but it doesn’t want to change. So if we can become aware, oh, I am not the ego. The ego is not who I am. It’s just the set pattern of conditioning that I’ve learned to become. But if it’s not what I am, and it’s a pattern of conditioning, then it can also change, it can also expand, it’s malleable, it’s not set in stone as a frozen, like, this is me, that being the case, then we start realizing if it’s not who I am, then as I let these beliefs and ideas about myself and stories go, it’s not like I’m dying. It’s just the illusions about what I believe myself to be dying. And that can free us up. And then rather than forcing ourselves as I started out with to like, bust through this, then we can just start holding ourselves with love, and compassion. 

And it’s like I understand it’s okay to be afraid, because it can be scary. So even if you feel the fear, if you can meet yourself with love, every step of the way, then the part of you that’s afraid can kind of relax and open and begin letting go and surrender. And then you can start developing in cooperation with those parts of yourself that aren’t cooperating, take a step forward. No, I don’t want to take a step forward, not because we’re bad or lazy, just because maybe we’re afraid of being seen. Because when we were seen, when we were young, we were judged, or when we were seen when we were young, we will be an or abused. Or when we were seen, we were young, we were ridiculed. So now I would rather not be seen and hide in the background, because you can’t hurt me if you don’t see me. And so all of these sorts of condition patterns are inside of us that we have to become aware of, and learn how to relate to that part of ourselves and love those parts of ourselves. To me healing is applying loving to those parts of ourselves that are hurting.

Julie Jancius 23:11

Yeah, let’s go deeper into that. Because I think that that’s a part that a lot of people struggle with, is that you do you have all of those layers of identity to your ego, and maybe we could list out what are all those layers that you have to look at layers of conditioning within ourselves.

Kute Blackson 23:32

I mean, first let’s just say ego is not a thing. It’s a process. Just to really be clear, like here’s an iPhone, here’s a pan, here’s a picture, right, whereas ego is not like this thing you can hold like a teddy bear, it is the process. Ego is a process, like a bicycle is– a bicycle pedaling, whereas pedaling, pedaling is a process more than a thing. So ego is a process of identification. And the more you are identified with name, body form, culture, religion, nationality, you know, successes, failures, memories, traumas, feelings, thoughts, right beliefs. This is who I am because I believe I’m Republican. I believe I’m Democrat. I believe that you were born and didn’t come out of the womb Republican or libertarian or you know, vegan or so any sense of identifying with a label is ego. This is what I believe. You know, white people love this, black people, or orange people or short people or this, Tall people have this and this is what I believe and I am this. Anything we put after it I am? That is ego, a clear separation?

Julie Jancius 25:06

Because it creates separation. Yeah. When you release all of that, all of the identifiers to ego, all of those layers, what you come back to as oneness with all that is.

Kute Blackson 25:20

Yes, I just ‘I am’, we are all that, to me that oneness in that inherent recognition of our own oneness is love. Because in that heaven recognition of what I am, as the inherent recognition of what I am, is also to realize what you are, that what I am is what you are and underneath the labels, what is breathing you and function you is the same essence of what is functioning me because there’s not a brown stole Blue Soul, a Chinese soul. Black soul, that’s just passport is the soul, it’s just energy is consciousness, you know. And so all of the labels that we have, when we have so many labels you’re this way, you’re a good cop, girl, you’re very intelligent, you’re, you know, you’re Mormon, you’re Jewish, you’re Buddhist, you’re good, you’re bad, then we hold on to it, because now certain experiences kind of reinforced those labels about who I think myself to be, gets reinforced. got all A’s Good boy, okay, I believe myself, I’m really intelligent, you drew something, and the teacher says, that isn’t a terrible piece of art, or your brother’s, that I’m terrible. Now, you don’t even believe that you’re good at art. So you shut down. And now you based on that belief system, you seek out experiences to reinforce that belief about yourself. It’s true, and then it just compounds and reinforces that and so the degree to which we are holding on to all of these labels, is that is ego, more than anything, so you can be like, deeply spiritual, and be deeply egoic in IE, look at how spiritual I am. Look how I meditate and you don’t meditate, because you know, I meditate seven hours and you just watch Netflix. So I’m way more spiritual than you and I couldn’t do these yoga, that is spiritually go, you know, and that’s just as much ego.

Julie Jancius 27:18

Yes, you can see that a lot within the spiritual community

Kute Blackson 27:22

That is just as much ego are more ego than like a billionaire who just is very humble, and does never tell us anybody anything. And he’s just living life loving people, being kind, being genuine, being authentic being of service, and not letting anyone know anything about himself. That’s so ego isn’t the form. It’s that sense of identification. It’s not about having or not having is the degree to which you’re holding on to those labels. 

Like I give people an example. If everyone imagines for a moment, imagine with me, in the next minute, that you imagine you had, let’s say, You slipped hit your head. This is just a fantasy imagination, that you hit your head, you woke up in a hospital somewhere on the world, you woke up in hospital, and you wake up, the doctor walks in and he says he or she says, you know, the good news is that good news or bad news? Bad news is– good news is you’re alive. You had an accident and you’re alive. Thank God. Bad news is you lost your memory. And you don’t remember anything. You look what? You don’t know. And so he asked me, Okay, what’s your name? And you start looking around, you don’t remember that your name is Julie. Oh, I don’t remember my name is – You don’t remember anything? Nothing. And the doctor tells you, the hospital we’re in right now is in Mongolia. Okay. And your name is Juju? Okay. So in that moment, like what happened to the Julie right, or the coup, or whoever, you know, as you’re listening, folks, just fill in your name. What happened to the version of you that you still believed yourself to be that character? Where did that go? Where did it go? With all of the sense of identification, you wouldn’t know your kids, you wouldn’t know your husband away. You wouldn’t know that you’re a Mormon, a Christian or Buddhist? An atheist. You wouldn’t know anything. You don’t remember a thing. And so the doctor just proceeds to tell you Hey, Juju, you have 14 children. And your religion is the religion of the lizards. Lizards have a mystical tradition throughout ancient history. And this is your lizard. You might be like, what but what could you say in that moment? What could you say? You wouldn’t know. And let’s say your real mother walks in the hospital. She hugs you. You wouldn’t know who the hell she was. You’d be like, Who the hell are you? And you asked her to leave. You don’t even know who she is. So you have no way to believe in the moment. 

So I will just ask him in that moment in the hospital, what is one thing you could know for sure. Because everything about yourself, you’ve been told, you are this, you are that you are this, you’ve all been, you’ve just you’ve been told by the doctor, this is who you are. And most of us in our lives, we’ve just been told who we are. This is what you believe, son. This is how life is daughter. This is the way the world works, kid. Okay, whether it’s conscious, or we pick it up unconsciously through osmosis, and the conversations at the dinner table and how we see our parents living, we’re still being told, and now we believe this to be true. Whether we’re conscious or not. So in that hospital room, what is the one thing that you could know for sure? Chris is nothing else like I am. And Julie know, somebody labeled you Julie, what if your parents called you Sarah, they just haven’t changed if I ate something that didn’t digest well. And they’re like, Sarah is her name right? You’d be a Sarah so so the only thing you would know, you wouldn’t know I’m not enough I’m unlovable. Only thing you would know for sure, as a direct experience, that now no one else is telling you is no some guru is just I am, here I am. I’m what I don’t know. But I am. So everything we put after that is really a story and a label. I’m not saying we don’t have to have it, you can have a story and a label, but the degree to which you hold tightly onto it. That is ego, that is limitation. And that is suffering.

Julie Jancius 31:39

So that hit me really hard, I was closing my eyes, because I really want to imagine that. When you do you strip away all of that you come back to just presence, presence, just beingness, just I am and you are consciousness. And it is from that place, which anything is possible, to move through you from the Divine into this world. And so your interpretation of surrender is surrender is a process, just like the ego is a process. And it’s not an event, like you just don’t have this ego and work through all of these layers in one day or one week or one month, and become who you are, is a process of releasing these identities. And it is a process of surrendering.

Kute Blackson 32:37

Yes, I will say, let me clarify something. I really like what you said, Yes. Let me make clear, you can’t become what you are. You already are it. Yeah, you are what you are. So you may not be in touch with it. Because layers of egoic identification and emotions and feelings may be clouding your seeing of what you are. And just because like it’s a little cloudy in Los Angeles, but doesn’t mean the sun isn’t there. And so there’s clouds, that clouds of emotion, the brief energy feelings, you know, traumas that might cloud your seeing of your truth of your essence. And so you can’t, you’re not doing the work to become what you are. Because you already are, what you are, whether you see it or not. You’re just doing the work to clear and cleanse your perception so that you can see what you already are more clearly. 

And so yes, surrender. On one level is a process, layer by layer, another layer of surrender another layer of doing the mental, emotional, psychological, therapeutic, spiritual work to cleanse one’s conditioning to loosen one’s conditioning so that you can see more clearly through the lens of conditioning. Oh, undefined. Okay. Okay, I’m hold, okay, I’m not that story. Okay, I’m not that in stories can drop. And we can start then feeling those feelings that we’ve learned to suppress layer by layer and dissolving them. Question the stories and belief systems that we’ve held so tightly on to for a sense of self and begin dissolving them. And so in that sense, it’s a process of a lifetime. At some point, you will have to surrender now or tomorrow, or 10 years from now, or at death or next life. If there is such a thing. You will have to surrender. There’s no way out of this process. And so it’s not about whether you will surrender it’s more about how will you participate in the process of life. That is surrender, because life is surrender. You know, there’s so much that is not in our control. And I really just want to kind of frame that surrender is our natural state is what is innate, it is what’s natural to us. The only reason it feels abnormal and hard is because we’ve been conditioned like if I’m holding a pen right now, I’m holding this pen very tightly making a fist. At first it feels tiring to hold this pen and exhausting to Hold this pen and I’m holding this pen making a fit. But eventually, it starts feeling normal. But if I say surrenders, let, let go drop the pen, how easy is not hard to just let go. But we’ve been so conditioned to hold on and not let go. So surrendering feels difficult. But in fact is natural. Surrender is hardwired into our physiology. The Divine is reminding us that this is the nature of life. How so? Well, every breath, breathe in, breathe out. You can’t just breathe in, breathe in, breathe out, every human being has to breathe in, and breathe out. To me. This is like the universe, reminding us of the nature of life, the nature of surrender, the nature of existence is just the way of things.

Julie Jancius 35:48

One time I heard you say that, when you go beyond yourself, you can come into this egoic mind thought that says it doesn’t make sense. And I had this happen, you know, when I very first started this podcast, because when I started it in 2019, I told my husband in the kitchen one night, like, what if 100 People listen to the show like that would be incredible. And going beyond yourself? Now 65,000 people a week sometimes listen to the podcast. Wow. And that wasn’t in like my realm of thinking when I started it like that seems to me like that does not make sense. To me, it doesn’t make any rational sense. You know, I’m the exact same as you a person next door, we’re really all the same. I think sometimes people can be scared of their own success. When you have that. It doesn’t make sense. Is that all about control? Is it not seeing the bigger picture?

Kute Blackson 36:54

Yeah, it’s the ego, again, right? Our perceived sense of self and what we believe ourselves. One of the ways or strategies that it tries to control is it tries to make sense of everything. And it tries to figure everything out, if I can figure everything out, know where I’m going and know where this is going and know what this means and know what this doesn’t mean, I know what this means know what this doesn’t mean, then I can minimize the possibility of being in the unknown, and minimize the possibility of getting hurt. And so the obsession or addiction to try to make sense of everything, when intended again, is just very limited, is limited. Because in the effort to make sense of everything, we will try to control everything and will limit life, and many of us will never take action on the guidance that we feel because it doesn’t make sense. We’ll never take action on the intuition that we feel because it doesn’t make sense. And so ego is a protective mechanism. So we have to learn to relate to it and be with it and understand it and not let it just run the show was like, thank you very much ego, I hear this voice I hear this fear, I acknowledge you, thank you. And we’re okay right now, like, we’re not five years old, right? Now you’re safe. This is okay. And we have to learn to understand, I’m not the ego. And just because I feel this mood or this feeling that doesn’t mean I have to listen to it. It doesn’t mean I have to like live it. And so yes, there is an obsession of control and trying to make sense of everything. And I think that is limiting because true inspiration will often arise from a deeper dimension of your being than the mind. And when it arises from the unconditioned dimension of your being your soul is not in time and space is not limited to your past. So it doesn’t make sense. Because it’s not your mind, that is manufacturing this story. It’s not your mind that is telling you do the podcast, it’s not your mind that is telling you to go in this direction. It’s arising from that unconditioned dimension of your being, which is not limited. And so now, it won’t fit your minds, the current capacity to understand it will likely be beyond it. 

That’s often when you know you’re on the right track. That’s often when you know you’re actually going in the right direction. And so I tell people, so if everything makes sense, the Vive worried, like be really worried, like, yeah, everything life makes sense. Everything makes sense, right? You’re like, yes, if you sit in your living room, and all you do is watch TV and go to your kitchen, everything’s gonna make sense. You know how to make sense of how to use the stove. You know how to make sense on how to use your phones, you know how to make sense of navigating your fridge and you know how to get from your bathroom to your bedroom to your living room. Everything makes sense. But this is a limited life. You want an unlimited life. You have to surrender to embracing the unknown, and the degree to which you can dance and embrace the unknown is the degree to which you will experience some fun and freedom in your life to freedom, because then you’re not putting limitations on life. And so you don’t have to understand where you’re going. To me this is a myth got to know where you’re going, No, because the mechanism that knows is limited, which is the mind, you don’t have to understand where you’re going. In order to get to exactly where you need to be. You don’t, because there was a dimension of you, that knows everything, because it’s a part of everything. And so when you feel a guidance, try this, folks don’t don’t question, feel it, nudge it, acknowledge it. Take a step. Feel it, don’t question. What I had to learn to do in my journey is I stopped questioning, I stopped, we question ourselves out of the flow. So often, stop questioning yourself, stop questioning the nudging, because that nudging will sort of move you in a direction. 

And I will also say, when something arises in life, from the need to make sense, we’re constantly trying to make a meaning of everything. Oh, what does it mean that you will say, Oh, is this person my soulmate? Or not? What? Who are they? What does this mean? It was, so we’re constantly trying to make meaning about things. I tell people, when things happen, or don’t happen, for a moment, resist the temptation to make up a meaning about it. And step back, what do you mean– step back? X happen. I don’t know what this means. But I’m willing to allow life to show me because when we impose a meaning on it, we end up imposing a meaning on it based on our conditioning, based on our conditioning from parents based on like, I really want this to happen. So I’m going to make it mean what serves my egos desire rather than what’s authentic. And so rather than just making up a meaning, and imposing and meaning, step back and say, I don’t know, and be in the curiosity, Curiosity is the key quality of freedom, curiosity, like a child, Curiosity is the key quality of surrender. And when you can be curious, like, I don’t know what this means. But I’m willing to allow life to show me. You meet someone in relationship. This is who they are, I’m going to marry the man. Let me allow the relationship to reveal itself to me rather than trying to make it as human beings. We’re constantly trying to make things be often what they’re not from the level of the ego. 

And so be willing to not know and allow life to allow life here’s the key allow life to show you allow life to lead you because life in and of itself it has an intelligence, how is it we trust Siri, on our iPhone, more than we trust life? Here, we just turn left we blind. We don’t ask Siri. Siri, what do you mean? And why are you telling me that? Which turn left? Turn right. 50 meters, meters forward to two mile turn, right? It simply could take us off a bridge, we don’t question right? We just keep going all of a sudden, where we’re at the destination. But our soul says, write that book, stop that podcast, go to that location, visit that person, class, go to that class, go to that seminar, whatever it is. Well, what does this mean? And it doesn’t make sense. I don’t understand when the universe is proving itself to us. Every day, there are trillions and trillions of cells inside of each and every one of us that are functioning without any of your conscious effort. You and I are breathing right now right here. Without any effort of us. It’s just happening. So why not trust that. Every day the sun shines every day the moon comes out every day, there was the there was night and the same energy and consciousness that is breathing you and breathing me and digesting your food is functioning or 8 billion human beings and all of existence and we don’t trust life?

Julie Jancius 43:49

Amazing. had this vision while you were talking earlier of the way to just be is to follow those nudges with blind faith. And you feel it when that nudge within you is aligned when it resonates when you’re in the flow. That lifeforce energy is just speaking to you. And the more and more you know, we know this, the more and more that you follow that nudge, the more that you are just simply being. I am.

Kute Blackson 44:24

It’s simple. Not always easy, but it’s simple.

Julie Jancius 44:28

Yeah. I love that. You have this book, The Magic of Surrender, that is a must read. Where can everybody find that? Where can everybody find you? 

Kute Blackson 44:39

yeah, get the book on Amazon. The book is out in paperback. It’s on sale on paperback on Amazon right now. So go get the book. It’s a very simple read, and the roadmap to living surrender in every area of your life. So check it out, for sure. And my main website is Kutes K U T E S KuteBlackson.com. Find out about my events and seminars there. My work my podcasts all talk on iTunes, Spotify, also. Yeah, Instagram Kute Blackson and Facebook..

Julie Jancius 45:13

Amazing. Thank you so much for your time. Thank you so much for being here. Thank you so much for everything that you’re putting out into the world. Thank you.

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