Hello, beautiful souls! When Jennifer Goldman fell critically ill, it marked a profound turning point for her family. Her mother, Caryn, shares how this challenging time allowed her to connect deeply with her loved ones and find profound meaning in the midst of adversity. This experience gave Caryn the opportunity to be intimately connected with her family, leading to a life filled with profound meaning. While Jennifer sees this whole experience a blessing so she can inspire other people who went through something similar as her.

Whether you’re navigating a health crisis or seeking a deeper connection with your loved ones, Jennifer’s journey, as told by Caryn, offers valuable insights into the power of presence and the importance of living a meaningful life.

Grab a copy of their book and get inspired with their story: https://inthefaceofcatastrophe.com/

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Transcript

What I learned throughout this whole thing the ability to be present, even though I was dealing with Jen who, you know, was critically critical.

It was almost like all the other stuff. in life. It was like a vacation. I know that’s a weird idea. a vacation from nonsense and a visit with ultimate reality. And it was, and in the book at the end of it, I talk about that in one of these in one of my entries, that this year gave me the opportunity to be present with Jen and my family and to be connected and intimate and to live this other life, which was so profoundly meaningful.



Welcome to the angels and awakening podcast, where we connect you with your angels, loved ones, and soul self. I’m your host and author, Julie Jancius. My journey began when I started hearing my late father before I knew he’d passed. Through my readings, membership, and Angel Reiki school, I help you awaken.

Heal and master your unique spiritual gifts. If you feel called to work with me, it’s your angels guiding you to discover your soul’s highest purpose. Details at theangelmedium.com. Thank you, earth angels for the five star reviews. You’re entered into a drawing to win a free session. Now let’s see what messages your angels have for you today.



Hello, beautiful souls. Welcome back to the Angels and Awakening podcast. And friends, we have a tremendous angel story to share with you today. It comes from authors, Jennifer [00:02:00] Goldman and Caryn Hirshleifer their book is called in the face of catastrophe, how a traumatic brain injury became a blessing. Jennifer, Karen, welcome to the show. Thank you. Thank you. We’re so happy to be here. So you have a stroke, Jennifer, at a young age, 31, 31, actually 33 days before

my 31st birthday.

I want you to walk us through this day because I believe your entire story is just, such a miracle and I think it’s going to open people’s hearts to miracles. Okay, so I

honestly don’t really remember the story that well, because my mom, she can tell it much better than I can.

all I remember is that I was at work, it was like 9 in the morning, and I just went down. I was noted to feel wobbly, I had a headache, and I just went down, and they brought I was at her store, which is a clothing business, and I’m good generation, and They just brought me to fitting room and that’s it.

My cousin is there and he [00:03:00] helped me and that’s it. So Karen, were you there or were you at home?

it was a Wednesday morning, August 18th, 2021, and it was 9 15 in the morning. And we live about 10 minutes from the store, which is fifth generation family business, which started over a hundred years ago in Brooklyn.

it’s interesting because Jen had only recently begun to work there before that. I’ve been there for about a

year.

Right. But the, the relevance of that is if she had not started to work at the store and had been elsewhere doing what she had been doing, she likely would have died. the fact that she had her stroke in my family business, surrounded by people who knew her and loved her, and immediately reached out to me and my husband, who happens to be a doctor.

A board certified emergency medicine doctor, was how she how she [00:04:00] survived. So, basically it was a Wednesday and my husband wasn’t working that day. And I got a call from our general manager. the store is called Herschleifers and we have about 150 employees and very close family business.

So we get a call. from the GM, she said, Karen, there’s something up with Jen. It’s like she’s on LSD. And so I said, LSD, I said, Jen has been into wellness and her prior business was all around motivational speaking. she had created a product, a number of products, wellness products. They were in stores across the country.

I mean, she was really, really successful. so I said, LSD, no, maybe she took too many herbal supplements. my husband basically said, you know, let me go over there and check this out. This sounds really weird. after he left, the [00:05:00] GM called back she said, Karen, what is going on?

Where is David? I need help here. And then I actually heard Jen, her screams in the background , as the blood from her. artery in her brain sort of exploded into her brain. And, it was horrifying. I’ll never forget the sound of those screams. It was like an animal being gored. and so I went immediately to work.

And as I was driving there, my sister, who also works there, I have two sisters, both of whom work there. My nephews, As I was driving there, I got a text from my sister who said, David, my husband, um, had arrived there. Jen has, a bleed in her brain come. And it was like, what? Jen is 30. Jen hikes.

she works out. She runs. you know, she’s completely independent. She, in terms of her [00:06:00] business, she built this business with her own two hands, investing all of her time and energy. She started in her, in her dorm room, at college. she’s fearless. She’s, You know, I used to call her my spider because, you know, if somebody came and messed with her web, she just rebuild it.

She wouldn’t sit there and say, Oh my gosh, you know, this is horrible. No, Jen would just say, Well, I’m going to fix it and move on. And that’s always been Jen, you know, really intrepid and

independent and just determined. And so now I get to the store and there’s an ambulance there. The back doors are open and I moved into the store.

And the staff is all standing around, weeping, and I see Jen having been loaded onto this, stretcher, and they were starting to move her out of the store, and I [00:07:00] came in and I looked at her. And I felt the stares of everyone else looking to me as I watched, as I processed what was going on with my daughter.

And Jen was really close to death at that point. She had, her hands were turned in, her legs were turned in, which is kind of, it’s called decorticate posturing. it’s like one step before. your brain herniates, meaning the brain actually, there’s so much fluid that it pushes it down, and that would be, fatal.

So she gets into the ambulance. we basically follow her to the hospital, And that was the beginning of the longest day of our lives. so, got to the hospital and, when we got there, the neurosurgeon who first saw her basically, he was going to do an angiogram to see what was going on in her brain.

And basically in that initial moment, the neurosurgeon said, you know, [00:08:00] based on what the ER has seen, she’s got multiple bleeds in her brain coming from different parts of her brain.

And if this is what they think it is, this is fatal. I cannot save your daughter. And it was just like, really happening. I mean, yesterday, yesterday she was driving, yesterday she was walking on the beach, you know, yesterday, This was Jen, my spider. And, here this was, it was just, I couldn’t even, I heard the words, but I couldn’t wrap my head around it.

And so he basically said, I’m going to go and do this and come back. It’s going to take me about 20 minutes. No, I’m sorry, 45 minutes. So he leaves. And I was sitting with Amanda. I was holding her hand. She was weeping. and about 10 minutes later, the door opens and he walks back in. And I think, Oh my God, she’s gone.

She’s gone. And we jumped up we said, [00:09:00] she’s gone. The doctor said, no, he said, I’ve got good news. And not so good news. The good news is that she does not have multiple bleeds in her brain. Okay, the bad news or the not so good news is not sure what is going on. I have my suspicions. and if what I think is right, we’d be able to take care of it.

The problem is that until the blood is drained from her brain, we can’t do anything. And he said, there’s so much blood in her brain, the bleeding had stopped, but it was all in her ventricles. It was, it was everywhere. And, he said basically, um, If she rebleeds, she’s going to die.

And so, you know, just for context, you know, I’m old, okay? I’m not old, but I, I, whatever, I’ve, I’ve had many years before me and hopefully many years ahead of me. but my brain is smaller there’s space in my [00:10:00] brain. So that

space around your brain,

right? the space around my brain. So fluid got into the space around my brain.

It wouldn’t be good, but Jen’s brain, the brain of a young person, is full, and there’s no space around it. So, whatever is going on with the blood, you know that as the blood sits there, it is interfering with nerves. You’ve got brain matter that as you sit there, as long as that blood is in there, it’s being messed with, it’s being destroyed, it’s being diminished in some way.

And so there was this like quest, get the blood out. And so the next 10 days, or actually the next few days, particularly, uh, basically they inserted a drain, the drain got clogged, they inserted a second drain, they got clogged, they inserted a third drain. And then [00:11:00] finally, they call and the way we would find this out was we’d get calls at night, you know, and it would basically, you know, they’d start off, you knew who it was, you didn’t need an introduction, but they would say hi, this is Dr.

So and so calling from so and so so and so and it’s like. What? Okay, what? We know what to the point, right? and so finally they decided that, the best move or really the only move was to open her brain, open her skull and remove a piece of her skull so that it gave her brain the space and the opportunity to sort of.

grow, enlarge, expand. And so they did that. And basically over, you know, a few days, the, the blood finally, finally dissipated to the point where the neurosurgeon was able to do the procedure. And indeed what he had thought it was, which is called a cavernous malformation is what it was. And a cavernous [00:12:00] malformation is like just a You know, if you think about like a blackberry or a raspberry, It’s basically your, it’s an enlargement of your blood vessel that lives on, connected to an artery in her brain.

many people have them, and even if somebody were to, identify it through some kind of MRI, most doctors wouldn’t do anything with it, because to

Because they rarely explode.

Right. They rarely Explode the I don’t know it’s it was just the the possibility that this would happen was so slim.

It was really crazy.

Right. So, so Jen’s, for whatever reason, this very exploded, and it ruptured. The artery. that’s what happened



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is that technically a stroke or, I’m familiar with brain aneurysms because they run in our family. Is it a brain aneurysm or this is something that you’re saying is completely different from both?

Well, there’s different kinds of strokes. There’s, this [00:14:00] stroke is based, first of all, not all strokes involve blood.

Okay.

only 10 percent actually involve blood. Wow. And the rest are dry strokes, which is a clot.

Right. Which they, they hopefully can remove or, make smaller and then it will sort of move throughout your body.

To someplace else in your body and exit your body. But this was, a violent, a violent explosion. Brain bleed. In her brain.

You know, Karen, it’s coming to me that, I don’t know about you as a mama, but kind of as a mama myself, you grow into mamahood, right? It just doesn’t come automatically.

And, early on, I would be like, well, Do you call 9 1 1 for this or don’t you, but I think a lot of what the angels try and do through this show is bring things to people who are going to need to know certain things possibly in the future. And, my grandfather had an episode [00:15:00] when he was going through cancer where his blood sugar levels went off.

And, what just strikes me from your story, Jennifer too, is that Your people surrounding you knew you, they knew that the behavior was not like you. but my grandma, I think just thought he was being goofy. She didn’t completely understand what was happening. And a lot of times when we see the behavior of somebody that we love change very drastically.

It’s not drugs or something at play. There’s something medically going very, very wrong. And it’s okay to drop everything to call 911. Uh, I think a lot of us think, well, do we call? Don’t we call? I don’t know. Do you wait it out? When in doubt, just call because you could be saving a life. So I’m sure your dad, Jennifer, is just there on top of everything, just managing your [00:16:00] care as you go.

Do you have any recollection of just being out or do you have no recollection?

I have nothing. I was in a medically induced coma under fentanyl and a cocktail of other drugs. I have no idea.

Yeah. So I know that you’re a very spiritual person you talk about in the book that this catastrophe you, you turned into a blessing.

And I love mom, that spider web analogy, because here she is building the spider web again and taking this catastrophe and building her life back. did you feel during that time, just any presence, either of you, of anyone on the other side, any signs of just everything is going to be okay, that the other side is at play and guiding your way forward?

Right. For me, it was more, trying to stay present.

That for me. Was, how I basically [00:17:00] managed. And what I mean by that is everyone around you. is they’re all sending you these signals that are completely terrifying. Like in the ICU, Jen was, they don’t normally have 30 year olds in the neurosurgery ICU.

And so when Jen was in the neurosurgery ICU, on one side, You could see that the nurses and the staff were like, this is my daughter, this is my sister, it’s my granddaughter. And it was almost like this collective coming together that we are not gonna lose this girl, not on our watch.

Okay, we’re gonna get her through this. And it was. sort of miraculous how you could feel that. at the same time, there was this sense when I first went in there, it, I had the sense that they were sizing me up to see if [00:18:00] I had the strength to navigate this. It was sort of like, look, you know, she doesn’t know what she’s in for.

And so it was almost like for me, it sort of made me a little bit scared because it’s like, my God, what if I don’t have the strength to navigate this? What if I can’t be there? What if I can’t do what I need to do? You know, so at the same time, there was that, but there was also this. this love for Jen and Jen had made these aroma therapy products, which were really awesome.

and so one of the first things that Amanda did, she basically said, we’re bringing you her products, because we’re trying to bring her back to life. She was. In a common, she was unconscious as. You know, not responding for some time, actually. And, so Amanda brought her products and would sort of spray them in the room and apply them to Jan.

And, but then all the nurses would come in and say, what is that? And I’d say, Oh, this is this product with neroli and [00:19:00] rose and chamomile. And it’s called this. And they said, Oh, wow, can I apply some of this? And so I said, Yeah, because, anything that brings Jen home, if this is going to make her connect more to home, and Amanda also has had this bear called Barry.

A very imaginative name, but she’s had Barry, this white bear that is now not very white, it’s sort of gray, and so Barry, she said Barry has to be with Jen, so she brings Barry, she orders like these, uh, hospital scrubs. For the bear, there’s this big and so she goes into the ICU and I mean, they’re very serious in the ICU.

And she says, Listen, this is Barry. Barry has got to be with Jen. Barry is as important as the stuff running through that IV. Okay. And he was. so, in every scene, every photo, every image of [00:20:00] Jen in the ICU. There is her with Barry under her arm, Barry stuffed by her side. it was pretty cool, There was a lot of stuff.

So, so basically going back to the idea of presence. you know, the doctors kept saying that, you know, your daughter is critically critical. okay. So I’m thinking, well, what does that mean? Okay. I know she’s critical. I know that, you know, She’s not out of the woods. She could be, she could die at any moment.

She’s still in the ICU, hooked up to any number of things. There’s a whole bunch of issues. but, what do they want me to do with that information? Do they want me to conclude that she’s dying? How do they know that? We’re not sure of that. You know, did they want me to start to plan her funeral?

it was sort of like, no, she’s here. She’s alive. I’m in this moment. I’m sitting here holding her hand.

And I need to create my own [00:21:00] sense of presence. Okay. be in this moment. Now do not worry because You know, so now, even if Jen lives, okay, so she’s lived this far, let’s say she continues to live.

What’s happening with her brain. Is she going to be paralyzed. She’s going to be able to communicate. Jen’s always been a motivational speaker, very passionate communicator,

and

it’s like, what’s going to happen. the point is that you can’t get there because You’ll die. You cannot get there. You need to stay.

I am here now. Yeah. I am here with you. I’m holding your hand and I am with you and you are with me.

Yeah.

And so for me, that was Sort of getting rid of everything else just being there and what I learned throughout this whole thing and then I’ll let Jen speak I don’t mean to monopolize this but the ability to be present, even though I was dealing with Jen [00:22:00] who, you know, was critically critical.

It was almost like all the other stuff. in life. It was like a vacation. I know that’s a weird idea. a vacation from nonsense and a visit with ultimate reality. And it was, and in the book at the end of it, you know, maybe we could read a couple of passages from it. But at the end of it, I talk about that in one of these in one of my entries, where I say that the year was because the book was pretty much written at the end of year one, but that the book that that this year gave me the opportunity to be present with Jen and my family and to be connected and intimate and to live this other life, which was so profoundly meaningful.



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Jen, what about you? This healing recovery had to have been so challenging and so hard. what got you through? And did you feel that presence from the other side and get signs along your healing journey? I’m actually still in it right now.

It’s not over at all. It happens every day. The journey is ongoing.

The progress I make continues. And some days, most days, I feel down. I feel like giving up. But, um, what [00:24:00] keeps me going is, like, the idea that I can get better. And I’m very motivated by my progress.

But Jen, actually has always listen to affirmations. and maybe I can read.

Yeah. I love that. I love that. And then I’ve got some messages too, if that’s okay to bring. Oh my God. Yes.

Yes. Yeah.

Yeah. You want to do

that first or? Yes.

Um, so I think it’s really, really fascinating when I tell a lot of people who go through my angel Reiki school because I teach people how to do this work and be a messenger.

Um, is that. Spirit can’t communicate something to you always in a caring way, unless you understand what that means. So if you didn’t know what the word green means, how do you communicate that to another person? If you don’t know what a dinosaur is, how do you communicate that to another person? So kind of the more that you know about life and the more [00:25:00] experienced.

which is why I think that a lot of people who are messengers here on Earth have gone through a lot of things themselves because then they know the experience of it and how to communicate it to others. And I take a lot of care in bringing through these messages to you, Jen, because my daughter was in the NICU, and then the Well, the pick you and then the Nick you, uh, for basically the first six months of her life, she was tube fed, um, until she was three.

She coded twice within her first two years. So I understand the relationship between mom and daughter. I understand the relationship between going through hard things and just not knowing if your child’s going to survive. but I felt a couple of different things. First, who is the father, um, Karen, yours or dad’s, uh, Jen’s dad [00:26:00] who was on the other side

when she went through her emergency.

they both were right.

Okay. So I kept getting the energy of them and just seeing Seeing them as mom was telling that story, they were with you in the surgeries, they were there with you when everything happened. They were there with you when, you were in the coma.

And I actually feel, even though you can’t remember it, if you’re a meditator, sometimes we go back to different energies and realize. what do they call it? Like a repressed memory. Sometimes people do that in counseling. Like they go back to remember something in childhood that they didn’t remember.

A felt sense.

Yes. So your grandfathers both say that if you kind of tune into it, it might come back to you in flashes in the future that you were there with both of them. Was there a grandmother, of yours, Jen, who passed? After you had the incident. Okay. [00:27:00] So she was on the other side before.

Yeah.

Okay. Cause she really comes through as the head of your spirit team.

And I tell everybody that everyone is that your mom, Karen? No, my dad’s mom. She is the head of my spirit team. She’s incredible. She’s such a great director of everything. Um, she’s very communicative. She’s very organized. She’s the leader of the pack. So when I say spirit team, I believe that I, I call God all that is right.

God universe source energy is there. Your angels, um, your loved ones on the other side. pets, guides, they’re all there as part of this, just loving positive team. That’s here to help you in every way, shape, and form. And one of the things that your grandmother has been showing me, and this is the sensitive part that like, You know, I, I work with women who haven’t been able to get pregnant and to be able to tell them a message, I just don’t [00:28:00] say you’re going to have a baby, you know, like that’s a really, that’s a big thing to say to somebody.

And if it’s not true, like you can’t bring that message true. And. Same with big healings like this, like you have had the most powerful miracle, but there are miracles coming in every single day for you. And your grandma really wants you to know that I see you continuing to be a powerhouse. I can see you recreating your career.

Rear, um, having different products again in the future, um, really getting back to a place where you feel old again. that health and also speaking, and it doesn’t have to be on anybody else’s terms because I get it in this industry. Like they will take as much as they can get and they will push you to do as much as you can do.

but it can be on your terms of. This is what I have to give and I’m willing to do five [00:29:00] stops over a summer and it’s just over the summer, but the rest of the year is to me or whatever it might look like for you, but you kind of get what I mean.

I fully believe this all happened for a reason. Yeah. I fully believe that like this was supposed to happen to me because it’s my path because you want to be a motivational speaker period.

Yeah. This is something that needed to happen. I needed to have this so I could have something to speak about.

A hundred percent. if it’s okay, I’m going to send you, if you send me your address afterwards, I’m going to send you my first book, Angels and Awakening, because in there I talk about the seraphim angels and, how some of us, when we’re younger, don’t always feel like we fit a hundred percent.

We kind of feel like we’re the odd ball out like that. Your grandma. Yeah. Your grandma says that you felt like that as a kid too. You just felt like you didn’t totally fit. And she goes, would you tell my granddaughter that that’s because she’s part of the Sarah FIMS team. And [00:30:00] I believe that there are reasons that we all come here.

We don’t all come here as souls for the same reason. Sometimes we’re on the other side, which has everything that we have here. And so And sometimes you’re at a family party on the other side and you’re like your husband and your son and your daughter are like, well, I think we’re ready for another lifetime.

I think we’re going to go through and you’re like, Jesus. No, I’m not going through for, you know, but you’re like, okay, I’ll go to be there for you. Sometimes we go to be there for our loved ones. Mom, you got a little bit of that energy over there. sometimes we really want to learn and we want to expand our souls and we want to be in a state of growth.

So we raise our hand and we ask, can I go, can I learn this? Can I experience this? And sometimes we’re just minding our own business on the other side, which was you Jen. and the Sarah, I was minding my own business on the other side. Yeah, you were minding your own business on the other side. And the [00:31:00] seraphim came and tapped and asked you, to do this work here on earth.

And I know that you have those hard days and I get that more than you understand. but they really, really want to encourage you to focus your mind’s eye, your attention on. Yeah. On the souls that you’re here to help and to serve in this life, because the Serafim keep saying, there’s a big group of lives that are going to be different and on a different trajectory because they hear your story because they feel your strength and because they feel the strength that you’ve used to get through this time and it.

It feeds them what they need to get through their own hardships. Thank you so much. I mean, that is

that that’s the goal here. So we started to write the book. when Jen, she, she basically came out of rehab, [00:32:00] which followed the hospital. we would sit here together and she would say, And by the way, Jen was paralyzed.

The stroke is the left frontal lobe, which is the site of Cognition. Language. Communication. Language. And also some movement. So she’s, she was paralyzed on the right side of her body. So the way it was described, her brain does not understand that her body has a right side.

And so, you know, for the last almost three years.

She’s been trying to reacquaint her brain with her right side. you know, originally was unable to walk, uh, was in a, you know, a wheelchair and now is able to walk with a walker and she comes to work three days a week. and, but so what happened was she’d come back we would sit here and I had taken notes when I was, I had taken notes when I was at the [00:33:00] hospital.

because It was too much to process and I knew that I would need to process it at some point. And so when I got back here, Jen said what happened to me. She had no memory, of what had happened to her at that point. I, so I started to tell her and walk through what had happened, and I pulled out my notes and I said, okay.

Are you up for this? And she said, I want to know it all. I want to hear it. And I started to talk to her and she started to cry. And she said, I can’t believe how awful that was for you guys. how horrible and sad that was for you guys. You know, I was not cognizant of, of what was going on, but you guys were.

And, you know, I said, well, Maybe we can write something together because I always would write, you know, it was never been, I’ve never been paid to write. I’ve never, you know, I’m an attorney and I work in my family business. And, Jen’s always been [00:34:00] writing and creating her own content for her products and her website.

I said, why don’t we write something together? And she said, that would be great. And then she said, and I want to call it the gift because this has been for me. A gift of time. I didn’t know I needed to be with my family. And so we started writing. And, you know, there were periods of time where, you know, so the book, it doesn’t really get to halfway through the book where Jen’s voice is actually becomes present.

Yeah. Jen, you have been through so much, and I want to bring through some private message because I, I don’t think that, everything is for the podcast to share. so I want to just let the audience know where they can find you first and foremost, where they can find the book, because it’s such a powerful story.

and we’ll put all of that information in the show notes below.

They can find me on social [00:35:00] media at Jennifer Rose Goldman on Facebook, Instagram, Tik TOK, and they can find me on, in the face of catastrophe. com. that’s it. Right, mom.

Yes.

Perfect. And for everybody listening, your angels want you to know that they are bringing through miracles to you every single day, just as Karen so beautifully talked about.

We have to believe we have to stay present. We have to open ourselves up to miracles, even in our darkest hour and just believe, believe, believe, believe that they are possible and not just once here or there, but miracles happen. Every single day again and again and again, and Jen, I just so appreciate you sharing your story and opening your heart Carolyn, you as well.

Thank you. Thank you so much for having us.



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